Why Feminism is for men too – Men Talk Feminism

If you believe in an equal world then the only conclusion should be that feminism is relevant to everyone. If you believe in a world where your abilities to contribute to society, and the rewards you receive from society, should only be determined by merit then feminism is the only conclusion. A world that is equal and fair is relevant because we all want to live in one.

A patriarchal society made my father the man he is. That is someone that drank away his failures till midnight every night. That is someone that would be verbally abusive to his wife and hit his children if they were up because he was embarrassed they saw him drunk. That is someone that honestly believed that hitting his children was better than his father burning him so was OK. I was taught to suck in my feelings as a child, not to cry, not to express. I tried to commit suicide at 12 and am just lucky that I now survive to tell the tale. Anything that helps destroy a system that causes so much pain and anguish surely will benefit men because equality doesn't work.

I have thought of myself as a feminist for all my life. I am proud that I've been raised with my mum as head of the family since I was 10. That being said, growing up in the 80s and 90s, I would say that I have also done things I am far from proud of and behaved in an anti-feminist manner. I can only apologise for that and hope those that I wronged forgive me at some point. I think as I got older into my early twenties I guess I could see the pain that some women were experiencing through the actions of men and it made me sick. That was what made me change and want to fully embrace gender equality and not just play lip service to it.

Feminism is relevant to men because fundamentally it’s about human rights and we all, deep down, want the best for ourselves and others. So why wouldn’t something which is striving to achieve this be relevant? It can be as simplistic as we all come from a woman and will have friends/family/partners etc who have been(and still are being) treated unfairly due to being a woman. Surely we want them to be treated fairly? But greater than this should be an overall view that being treated fairly shouldn’t need to be argued for. We should all strive for a society where being treated fairly goes without being asked for. We should embrace any attempts to achieve this.

People often make the mistake that feminism is for the benefit of women, when in fact an equal society benefits everyone within it. It’s been clear for a long time that boys and men struggle to cope with the expectations which often come with “our role”, and have been conditioned to pretend things are ok when they are not. Feminism can support men by challenging the false ideology that needing help sometimes or not being the “alpha” male is a sign of weakness. Feminism challenges the notion that when men feel disempowered that we must abuse others to gain this. By doing this, it recognises what men have often failed to recognise due to the pressures we have been socialised to believe. Feminism shows it doesn’t need to be a battle of us and them, but can be a united cause to achieve a positive goal for us all.

I’ve always had strong women in my life so have always had a generally positive view of feminism. Sadly though, I have to acknowledge that I haven’t always been supportive of feminism in that my behaviour in the past has been misogynistic and harmful to women. Over time becoming more informed myself around human rights and politics/social theories etc has opened my eyes to how my behaviour can impact on others and how I can use my learning and experiences to support others not to make the same mistakes. Having my eyes open, I now see clearly the inequality and abhorrent behaviours witnessed by women on a day to day basis and recognise things must change. None of us are perfect, but that doesn’t mean we can’t change and aim to be better.

Feminism is everything about ensuring attitudes to any gender are equal, and that opportunities in life and society are equal regardless of gender. By embracing Feminism, all men can be active players in bringing everyone's talents, gifts and qualities to bear in society, men and women alike. Only then will the world truly benefit from what humanity can achieve. By artificially placing barriers of any kind in front of women, men are doing themselves and society as a whole, a huge disservice by cutting off at least 50% of the opportunities for advancement and improved quality of society.

Men have, for too long, been pigeonholed by archaic systems, believing that there is only one way to be a "man" and to be successful and happy. This limiting and often toxic discourse has led men to think that keeping women down in any way, keeps men strong and at the top of the tree. In reality we see emotionally stunted males who are unable to even express themselves properly, high rates of male suicide, depression and feeling of being a failure if they have not managed to fulfil a specific type of stereotype. By embracing feminism, men are freed from all of this and can live their true selves while relieving so much unnecessary pressure. Quite simply, feminism liberates men from limiting stereotypes and allows them to be full partners with women in the betterment of society, hence improving men's fulfillment significantly. What more could anyone ask??

Yes, I have always been a natural feminist, even without having understood what the term truly meant. I have since my youth, never understood why just by being born, you are automatically consigned to a certain role, or limiting experience of life. For me, women have such astonishing innate qualities that by being equal with men, can achieve amazing things in the world. Gender should be irrelevant, it's people's qualities, talents and actions that should count in anything. I have never even had to think about it - feminism is actually the only way to ensure a great world to live in! We've already seen the results of the patriarchal system, it simply doesn't work. Let's change things!!

Because when women do well we all do well! As I understand it, feminism is about equality for all genders, and so much of the resistance against accepting and endorsing it comes from men who either don't or are unwilling to understand that. Sexism is ingrained in so much of historical and modern society, both in terms of the obstacles that there are against women to receive the same equality of opportunities as men enjoy, to expectations for men to behave a certain very limited way. None of this is healthy and none of this is right. Feminism needs men to be compassionate, attentive and proactive allies, willing to de-centre themselves, recognise their place and responsibility, and listen to what they can do to help.

As above, everybody only stands to benefit when women are treated equally and are able to access the same opportunities and live as they want without judgement or objectification. It liberates men from a narrow-minded, self-destructive, self-defeating understanding of what masculinity means or can be, and opens up new identities leading us away from the kind of assumptions underlying toxic masculinity, which render us posturing, emotionally stunted, insecure boys. Feminism helps us empathise with women and with other men, discover our true worth and foster our capacity for real emotional growth.

I have always tried to see myself as someone respecting women, and took pride in not practicing the same out and out misogyny of many people around me growing up. However, the more I reflect on myself and my past, I recognise how shallow and inadequate my words have been and how narrow my understanding of the experience of women really is. I am lucky to be surrounded by such wonderful women and men willing to share and show patience with me, and I hope I never stop learning to be better.

It challenges the patriarchy and allows men to think about equality and respect. It shows men a different way to challenge without turning to violent behaviour.

Feminism is a way for men to think more about respect for women and children.

I have always been a feminist and challenged all types of negative behaviour. Including racism, sexism and all forms of violence towards women and children.